Thirty Something
I always felt rushed to accomplish the goals that I thought others wanted me to achieve. When I was 19, I was already in a rush to get a stable career, a fancy car, and have my own place. At 23, I was rushing to make it big in Los Angeles as a model or an actress. It seems like I was putting myself on some kind of time limit, mainly because I was comparing myself to others. I had family members who were very young when they became independent and successful. I truly believed that I had to achieve the same successes they had, in order to also be successful. I never knew that the 20's are the ages of ups and downs, and trying to figure things out. I always thought I had to have it all together by age 25. HA!!! At age 27, I laugh at the fact that I was so ignorant to reality. An ignorance that wasn't always blissful.
One of the main reasons why I thought my 20's were supposed to be the "end all be all" was because many of my close family members were teen mothers. When you have a child at age 15, 16, 17 or 18, you are forced to have it all together in your 20's, if you want to make a comfortable life for your children. My mom (who was a teen mom), always had a decent job, a reliable vehicle and a cozy home for as long as I can remember. But as a child, you really don't grasp the concept of having a young mommy. When I was 10 my mother was 28, still very young. Yet to me, she had it going on. All of my aunts and uncles had their own places and their own cars very early, and to me that was the norm.Therefore, when I found myself bouncing aimlessly from college to college, and from job to job without any stability, I started to feel like a failure.
My other family members who I looked up to that "had it all together" in my eyes, were away at college. They were pursuing their degrees, but also had their own places (whether it was a dorm or off campus apartment) and cars. Many times, I'd have neither. I thought staying with my parents at age 25 was the worst possible thing ever, because I was supposed to be independent and on my own by then. AAAAAHHHH FOOOEY!!! According to Arnett & Maynard, the authors of a Psychology book on Child Development, the 20's are a time of trial and error. People change their majors in college, they switch careers, and they move/relocate a lot simply because they are trying to find the best fit in life for them. Of course this doesn't mean that every person in their 20's will go through this exact process, however the majority of us do, and that's fine!
It's ok if you don't have every thing figured out by the time you're 25. Keep testing the waters (the positive waters) of life. If you want to study abroad for a semester to see what life would be like in Bucharest; do it! If you want to change your major from Biochemical Engineering to Dance; why not? One thing about being in my 20's is that I've tried many things, some have worked out and some have not. But the point is, I have no regrets because I can at least say that I tried.
So enjoy your 20's, don't put too many time limits on your personal success. And most definitely don't compare yourself to others.
Once those thirty somethings come around, life will begin to get more structured and you'll find your way.
One of the main reasons why I thought my 20's were supposed to be the "end all be all" was because many of my close family members were teen mothers. When you have a child at age 15, 16, 17 or 18, you are forced to have it all together in your 20's, if you want to make a comfortable life for your children. My mom (who was a teen mom), always had a decent job, a reliable vehicle and a cozy home for as long as I can remember. But as a child, you really don't grasp the concept of having a young mommy. When I was 10 my mother was 28, still very young. Yet to me, she had it going on. All of my aunts and uncles had their own places and their own cars very early, and to me that was the norm.Therefore, when I found myself bouncing aimlessly from college to college, and from job to job without any stability, I started to feel like a failure.
My other family members who I looked up to that "had it all together" in my eyes, were away at college. They were pursuing their degrees, but also had their own places (whether it was a dorm or off campus apartment) and cars. Many times, I'd have neither. I thought staying with my parents at age 25 was the worst possible thing ever, because I was supposed to be independent and on my own by then. AAAAAHHHH FOOOEY!!! According to Arnett & Maynard, the authors of a Psychology book on Child Development, the 20's are a time of trial and error. People change their majors in college, they switch careers, and they move/relocate a lot simply because they are trying to find the best fit in life for them. Of course this doesn't mean that every person in their 20's will go through this exact process, however the majority of us do, and that's fine!
It's ok if you don't have every thing figured out by the time you're 25. Keep testing the waters (the positive waters) of life. If you want to study abroad for a semester to see what life would be like in Bucharest; do it! If you want to change your major from Biochemical Engineering to Dance; why not? One thing about being in my 20's is that I've tried many things, some have worked out and some have not. But the point is, I have no regrets because I can at least say that I tried.
So enjoy your 20's, don't put too many time limits on your personal success. And most definitely don't compare yourself to others.
Once those thirty somethings come around, life will begin to get more structured and you'll find your way.
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