No Kid Zone
"No kid, zone! No kid, zone! I know better! I know better!" Sang two of my god sisters jokingly at a recent family function. I must admit that it was slightly offensive to me. I felt as if my sisters believed they had some sort of advantage over me because they didn't have any children. Funny thing is, I used to feel the same way before becoming a mommy.
I remember in my early 20's looking down on women with kids, and always bragging on the fact that I had none. I really thought that having children was an automatic strike against another woman. I saw all the drama caused by having children. I'd seen the struggles of teen parenting. And I saw how much mothers had to sacrifice their fun and freedom because they had children. In my mind, just like my god sisters, I sang; "No kid zone! No kid, zone! I know better! I know better!"
Then when I was around 23, a beautiful baby named Zaida was born. The first time I held her in my lap, I fell in love. Zaida was this perfect little bundle of smiles and heaven. But most importantly, Zaida had a phenomenal mother. My cousin Stacey was the most caring, nurturing and knowledgeable mother I'd ever seen. She didn't know it then, but I studied the way she was so attentive and loving to this little child. Stacey nursed baby Zaida, she read to her, and she always kept baby Zaida close to her bosom. As I watched Z grow, her temperament was a direct reflection of the good things Stacey poured into her.
Z was always laughing and smiling. She is still a pleasant and happy child today. As I continued to spend more time with Stacey and Z, my soul opened up to the idea of motherhood. About a year later I was pregnant with my Ryan.
At 24, I was ready. I was so happy when I found out I was pregnant! I was going to give all of my goodness to this child, just like Stacey did with Z. I took advantage of several free parenting programs including Alternaterm. I did child birthing classes and breast feeding classes, in addition to the parenting classes. They were all free. I also never missed a prenatal appointment, and ate a healthy diet. By the time I was 9 months, I felt like I had adequately prepared myself for motherhood. And on June 6, 2012, my baby had finally arrived.
Pregnancy, delivery and then finally becoming a mommy were the three most beautiful experiences I've ever had in life. Carrying, birthing and nurturing a child gave me such a huge sense of empowerment! I make people, how awesome is that! I never regretted having my son, I didn't wish I would have stayed in the "no kid zone." Even with all my son is going through, I know we were made for each other. Can children be stressful at times? Yes, of course. But what in life is easy with no challenges along the way? Since I've had my baby I've accomplish so much more than when I was childless.
I published my book when I was pregnant. I started my business while I was pregnant. I went back to college and earned my first degree when my son was 6 weeks. I've done innumerable speaking engagements, competed in speaking contests, gotten married (and divorced), travelled, met great people, and become a better woman since having a kid. My son is my motivation.
So, my question to all the women celebrating in the "no kid zone" is; are you taking advantage of your time in the "no kid zone?"
You have an abundance of free time and energy to accomplish all of your dreams. I encourage you to write your book, start your business, and get your degree now, while it's just you. Because trust and believe there are some women with three or more children who are doing some amazing things in addition to mothering their kids. Use this time wisely because maybe one day, you'll be blessed with the privilege of be someones mom.
I remember in my early 20's looking down on women with kids, and always bragging on the fact that I had none. I really thought that having children was an automatic strike against another woman. I saw all the drama caused by having children. I'd seen the struggles of teen parenting. And I saw how much mothers had to sacrifice their fun and freedom because they had children. In my mind, just like my god sisters, I sang; "No kid zone! No kid, zone! I know better! I know better!"
Then when I was around 23, a beautiful baby named Zaida was born. The first time I held her in my lap, I fell in love. Zaida was this perfect little bundle of smiles and heaven. But most importantly, Zaida had a phenomenal mother. My cousin Stacey was the most caring, nurturing and knowledgeable mother I'd ever seen. She didn't know it then, but I studied the way she was so attentive and loving to this little child. Stacey nursed baby Zaida, she read to her, and she always kept baby Zaida close to her bosom. As I watched Z grow, her temperament was a direct reflection of the good things Stacey poured into her.
Z was always laughing and smiling. She is still a pleasant and happy child today. As I continued to spend more time with Stacey and Z, my soul opened up to the idea of motherhood. About a year later I was pregnant with my Ryan.
At 24, I was ready. I was so happy when I found out I was pregnant! I was going to give all of my goodness to this child, just like Stacey did with Z. I took advantage of several free parenting programs including Alternaterm. I did child birthing classes and breast feeding classes, in addition to the parenting classes. They were all free. I also never missed a prenatal appointment, and ate a healthy diet. By the time I was 9 months, I felt like I had adequately prepared myself for motherhood. And on June 6, 2012, my baby had finally arrived.
Pregnancy, delivery and then finally becoming a mommy were the three most beautiful experiences I've ever had in life. Carrying, birthing and nurturing a child gave me such a huge sense of empowerment! I make people, how awesome is that! I never regretted having my son, I didn't wish I would have stayed in the "no kid zone." Even with all my son is going through, I know we were made for each other. Can children be stressful at times? Yes, of course. But what in life is easy with no challenges along the way? Since I've had my baby I've accomplish so much more than when I was childless.
I published my book when I was pregnant. I started my business while I was pregnant. I went back to college and earned my first degree when my son was 6 weeks. I've done innumerable speaking engagements, competed in speaking contests, gotten married (and divorced), travelled, met great people, and become a better woman since having a kid. My son is my motivation.
So, my question to all the women celebrating in the "no kid zone" is; are you taking advantage of your time in the "no kid zone?"
You have an abundance of free time and energy to accomplish all of your dreams. I encourage you to write your book, start your business, and get your degree now, while it's just you. Because trust and believe there are some women with three or more children who are doing some amazing things in addition to mothering their kids. Use this time wisely because maybe one day, you'll be blessed with the privilege of be someones mom.
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