I Love My Baby Daddy

Not like that. I said love, not in love.
HOWEVER...

He is an outstanding father who has matured significantly over the past seven years. We've had our problems, issues, and fall outs just like everyone else, but he's a damn good dad. We've faced some storms together. We were there for one another during the most trying times two human beings could ever face. We stood tall along side our son when he battled and triumphed over cancer.

Somehow we kept our sanity as we watched our son fight for his life. It's hard not to feel a sacred bond with my son's father after going through all of that with him. For those months of turmoil, we were the only two people in the world who knew exactly how the other person was feeling. Much deeper than empathy. It was a simultaneous emotional connection. We were forced to be best friends because no one could relate more to us, than us. When your kid kicks cancer's ass, there's no prouder moment. And what better person to celebrate it with, than the person who helped you bring that child into the world?

I am so blessed to have a man in my child's life who actually genuinely enjoys spending time with his son. They are extremely close, and they love and admire one another. My son's father is giving our child the best parts of himself. He is gentle, caring, loving, nurturing and warm with our son. He's taught him so many wonderful things.

Basketball is his passion and his first love. Naturally, he's sharing that passion with our son.
My son came home from the hospital after he was born, to a basketball in his crib. Ryan has been dribbling, shooting and watching basketball for practically his entire life. In our current residence, Ryan has two basketball hoops and at least a dozen basketballs of various colors and sizes. He is already learning and comprehending the fundamentals of the game. He has already perfected his shooting form. Look out Lebron Jr...

Ryan learned how to use the potty standing up, by watching his dad. His dad keeps him often, and during the potty training days he bought Ryan a little urinal. It's so cute. Also, his dad insists that Ryan wear boxer briefs instead of "tighty whities." Must be a man thing... He even encourages Ryan to do push ups every morning right after he wakes up. I don't get it, must be another man thing. Either way, I don't question it or object to it. I think it's pretty cool.

Another thing I love about this guy is that he has a huge family. His family is tight knit and loving of one another. There are dozens of aunts and uncles, and hundreds of cousins who all love "Lil H" dearly. I see pictures of our son smiling with a different cousin just about every other weekend. I love how Ryan is able to play with kids his age that are related to him. He should be around kids playing and laughing every weekend instead being cooped up under my all day. I mean Ryan does have another sibling but she's 9 years my junior, so that's no fun.

These two guys are amazing together. No matter what he and I have gone through in the past, I'm more concerned about the present. He shown me consistently that he is improving himself as a man, father, and human. He's always been here for our son, and he always contributes financially. Even if he sometimes can't give as much as he'd like to financially, I don't trip. I'd rather him give of himself in time rather than money anyway. As long as I see him trying his very best, I'm satisfied.

***Ladies if the father of your child/children is clearly putting his best foot forward and is genuinely trying to be apart of the kids lives, consider holding off on calling your child support case worker and enforcing the order. ***

I know that's a touchy subject. I know that child support really does help when money is tight. However, I'd rather have my son's father out of jail, with a valid driver's license, spending priceless moments with his kids. Every situation is different and I understand that. The children can't survive without money. I get that too. Personally, I'm not going down to child support if my son's dad is a little behind on his payments. What he lacks in finances he over compensates in time spent.

It's sad that "good" parents seem to be few and far between in our demographic, especially good fathers. It's a shame that I feel "lucky" to have my son's father active in his life. Shouldn't that be the norm? Shouldn't moms and dads naturally want to be there for their kids?

We all know the answers to those questions.

I'm so happy and grateful that the two of us have finally arrived at a place mentally that is solely focused on the well being of our son. I think of how balanced my son is becoming by having the both of us pouring into him on a consistent basis. I think of how complete and excited my baby becomes when he is pillared by both his mom and dad.

At last we are on one accord and it's harmonious. Although we are not married, or in a relationship, we are forever connected through the soul we brought to life together.

I appreciate you H. We made a special child together and we are raising him to be a leader, a King. Thank you.